I grew up as your usual suburbanite
A tiny town in Massachusetts
Overwhelmingly white ♪
I went to church on Sundays
In a suit and a tie
Then spent my free time
Watching Family Guy

I started doing comedy
When I was just a sheltered kid
I wrote offensive shit
And I said it
Father, please forgive me
For I did not realize what I did
Or that I'd live to regret it

Times are changing
And I'm getting old
Are you gonna hold me accountable?
My bed is empty, and I'm getting cold
Isn't anybody gonna
Hold me accountable?

[*moans*]

I'm problematic
He's a problem
When I was 17, on Halloween
I dressed up as Aladdin
He's a problem
I did not darken my skin
But still it feels weird in hindsight

I want to show you
How I'm growing as a person, but first
I feel I must address the lyrics
From the previous verse
I tried to hide behind my childhood
And that's not okay
My actions are my own
I won't explain them away

I've done a lot of self-reflecting
Since I started singing this song
I was totally wrong when I said it
Father, please forgive me
For I did not realize what I did
Or that I'd live to regret it

Times are changing
And I'm getting old
Are you gonna hold me accountable?
My bed is empty, and I'm getting cold
Isn't anybody gonna
Hold me accountable?

[*moan echoing*]

I'm problematic
He's a problem
I just remembered that Aladdin costume's
In my mother's attic
He's a problem
I'm gonna go home and burn it
Or not burn it. Is burning it bad?
What should I do with it?

And I've been totally awful
My closet is chock-full of stuff
That is vaguely shitty
All of it was perfectly lawful
Just not very thoughtful at all
And just really shitty

And I've been totally awful
My closet is chock-full of stuff
That is vaguely shitty
All of it was perfectly lawful
Just not very thoughtful at all
And just really

And I'm really fucking sorry
Bitch, I'm trying to listen
Shit, I've been complacent
Sorry
If I'm gonna catch up
First, I gotta fess up
Sorry
Sorry