I remember sayin I don't care either way
Just as long as he or she is healthy I'm ok
Then the doctor pointed to the corner of the screen
And said you see that thing right there well you know what that means

And I started wondering who he was going to be
And I thought heaven help us if he's anything like me
He'll probably climb a tree to tall and ride he's bike to fast
End up every summer wearing something in a cast
He's gonna throw a ball and break some glass in a window down the street
He's gonna get in trouble oh he's gonna get in fights
I'm gonna lose my temper and some sleep
It's safe to say that I'm gonna get my pay back if he's anything like me

I can see him right now knees all skinned up
With a magnifying glass trying to melt the Tonka truck
Won't he be a sight with his football helmet on
That'll be his first love till his first love comes along
He'll get his heart broke by the time hes in his teens
And heaven help him if he's anything like me

He'll probably stay out to late and drive his car to fast
Get a speeding ticket he'll pay for mowing grass
He's gonna get caught skipping class and be ground for a week
He's gonna get in trouble he's gonna get in fights
I'm gonna lose my temper and some sleep
It's safe to say that im gonna get my pay back if he's anything like me

He's gonna love me and hate me along the way
Years are gonna fly by I already dread the day
He's gonna hug his momma he's gonna shake my hand
He's gonna act like he cant wait to leave
But as he drives out hell cry his eyes out
If he's anything like me there's worse folks to be like
Aw he'll be alright if he's anything like me