Heather says that each of us here
Is allowed just one friend
And just one friend alone
That's what best friends are for
Heather says that any among us who think
That it's better to have three or four
Better change your mind
That's what she says

Heather does bad things in class but
She never-no never gets blamed
And I'll wager already this week
About 15 more kids have been framed
And of course no one would never dare tell
On dear Heather - dear Heather

And Heather says
Not a soul in the whole of the
Fourth grade class
Can jump near as high or can run as fast.
I suspect someone could
But I can't deny
Heather must win so we never try
The challenge appears on her lips
With a grin and she gives us
That look that says Heather must win
And we do what Heather says

Heather makes fun of the kid
With the mole and the extra large ears
And she's not satisfied till he's
Screaming and red and in tears
And of course one would never dare tell
On dear Heather - sweet Heather

Heather must be first in hopscotch
And when we play tag she is it
Soon things will change cuz the kids
Specially Margaret are sick of it
And even I myself think that its cruel
That everything Heather says
Goes at our school.
Everything Heather says
Goes at our school