I haven't been in my head in a while
So I smile
But know there's a pile of emotions

That I gotta go through when I am tired
The wind blows open my curtains
And opens my mind
Shows me if I am certain, I would be worth it, know I'll be fine
Challenging my bed to a losing battle
I have to call myself a loser asshole
But I promise most days I win the fight
Jolt awake snow breaks it's business time
Carry myself through the wall of air
Call upstairs is papa there
Can you support me when I need more peace
Pour me a glass of scotch and implore me
Express your point of view
Have strong opinions when you know your truth
Then he makes the claim that I'm smarter than him
He's the smartest I know so I've got to give in
Confidence rising, anxiety's got opposite timing
Polish it shiny, my soul and my dress shoes
Body and mind are finally aligning
High fever like a hundred plus
I see demons and bleed from the succubus
Lights out fight back with uppercuts
Always be pondering wanderlust
But you calmed me down then you freed my soul
Took me under your wing
Even a flightless bird who fights the urge can write the words and then sing
So I belt
And I've felt lately grateful
Steering my eyes away from my hell cuz then I'd melt

Reflection and the pressure make diamonds outta coal
I look around know I am not alone
Even in hard times I'll play my cards right
I am emboldened and never will fold
Check your billfold wanna be among the presidents
I know I am on the precipice
There's no pretending it's only reality
Playing the game is just a formality
Making a change but doing it casually
Of my own range I may be a casualty
Life ain't so strange with my family
I will sleep for centuries and then
Plot a plan to breathe fire
Cause a champ to retire cuz the movement is gorgeous
Create the blueprint a fortress
Is what I'm building out of my brain

From ego try to abstain
Hungry I am under siege
Waves wanna drag me underneath
It is so peaceful under seas
Maybe here I could stay
I could float among the friendly foreign faces
Won't choke air provided by adoring makers
I'll bide my time and go back
Sip on some makers or dos eq
Dress myself at the coat check
Be cool calm and collected
Be cool strong and collecting
All of my severance
For playing hooky I am a rookie
Act like a veteran soon to be better man
So if I sigh, just know I need the release
I wade in a pool of mercury it's only knee deep
Unwind my fate rewind the tape and life on repeat
You see me