Mum said that I would forget
My head
If it weren't screwed on
Bumping a sad string quartet
In my headphones
As my theme song

I attempt to jog the memory loss
Nostalgically eat candy floss
And supplements I bought from a quack
Perhaps I need some stronger sauce
It's hung like an albatross
Around my neck, it's breaking my back

Lose every Monopoly
Game we would play
On the weekend
Think I lost my virginity
Under a tree
Now that's some achievement

And thinking back in retrospect
I should've had more respect
No regrets, but hindsight's a bitch
I should have practiced safer sex
Should have practiced happiness
Should have scratched every itch

And it's all downhill from here
So I buckle up and hope I'll survive this slippy slope
I'm an unwilling volunteer
Like an animal under a microscope

I used to run like the wind
Out of my skin
Throw up on the back seat
If I was out on a whim
I'd drop you my pin
And you would play taxi

I attempt to jog the memory loss
Eat my grandma's applesauce
Take me back to meat and two veg
I remember fighting with my boss
Paid holiday and travel costs
I've no idea what happened next

And it's all downhill from here
So I buckle up and hope I'll survive this slippy slope
I'm an unwilling volunteer
Like an animal under a microscope

Ooh-ooh-ooh
Ooh-ooh-ooh, ooh
Like an animal under a microscope
Ooh-ooh-ooh
Ooh-ooh-ooh, ooh
Like an animal under a microscope

And it's all downhill from here
So I buckle up and hope I'll survive this slippy slope
I'm an unwilling volunteer
Like an animal under a microscope