Barney and Friday - Were two cats who didn't have nine lives
Barney and Friday - Were only here what seemed a short time
Barney and Friday - Didn't have that lame fetch dog personality
Barney and Friday - Were way too tuned for this reality

Barney and Friday - Don't tell me dogs are smarter
Barney and Friday - Cuz I know better
Barney and Friday - Cats know what people are all about
Barney and Friday - That's why they'd rather be left out

Barney was already dead
So was Friday but I didn't want to realize it
So I went to the pound anyway
Where they keep the dogs forever
Barking, barking, barking-barking-barking
But the cats are in cages marked 1, 2 and 3
All proud, they don't make any sound
Just a casual glance, till the hammer came down
(Some destroyed the day they were found)

Barney and Friday - Were two cats who didn't have nine lives
Barney and Friday - Were only here what seemed a short time
Barney and Friday - Didn't have that lame fetch dog personality
Barney and Friday - Were way too tuned for this reality

Barney and Friday - Cats are treated like garbage
Barney and Friday - They know what we're about
Barney and Friday - That's why they don't buy into the training shit
Barney and Friday - They'd rather be left out

Fix your animals
Too bad we can't fix you
Stupid motherfucker
Lame ass redneck attack dog moron