Bravely bold Sir Robin, rode forth from Camelot,

He was not afraid to die, Oh Brave Sir Robin,

He was not at all afraid to be killed in nasty ways

Brave, brave, brave, brave Sir Robin.



He was not in the least bit scared to be mashed into a pulp

Or to have his eyes gouged out and his elbows broken;

To have his kneecaps split and his body burned away

And his limbs all hacked and mangled, brave Sir Robin.



His head smashed in, and his heart cut out,

And his liver removed, and his bowels unplugged,

And his nostrils raped, and his bottom burned off,

And his penis split ... and his ...



Brave Sir Robin ran away.

Bravely ran away, away.

When danger reared its ugly head,

He bravely turned his tail and fled

Yes, Brave Sir Robin turned about

And gallantly he chickened out

Bravely taking to his feet

He beat a very brave retreat

Bravest of the brave Sir Robin

Petrified of being dead

Soiled his pants then brave Sir Robin

Turned away and fled.

Bravely good Sir Robin was not at all afraid

To have his eyeballs skewered ...

... and his kidneys burnt and his nipples skewered off ...