Hey mister man in the street - excuse me
Do you have a few moments to spare? Oh yeah...
Don't worry, I'm not trying to sell you anything you wouldn't want
I'm just a questionnaire...

Tell me what you think about this low-fat diet shampoo
Do you think it's Crunchy, Half-Cruncy, or Not Crunchy at all?
Put a tick in the appropriate box - there's nothing to it...

Yes/No/Don't Know - I Don't Care
I'm only a Questionnaire, only a Questionnaire...

Please mister man in the street - believe me
I'm only doing my job and I need to know
everything about you, take it easy, all you gotta do
Is answer 'yes' or 'no'...

Tell me what think about the Devil and the Deep Blue Sea
Do you think there's one True God, a False God, or No God at all?
Put a tick in the appropriate box - there's nothing to it...

Yes/No/Don't Know - I Don't Care
I'm only a Questionnaire...
Yes/No/Don't Know - I Don't Care
I'm only a Questionnaire, only a Questionnaire...

...Now can you
Tell me what you think about how easy it can be to buy a gun?
Do you think it's Crazy, Half Crazy, or Not Crazy at all?
Put a tick in the appropriate box...