if heavy metal bands wrote no heavy metal ballads
they'd be down a Shoney's tossing Chef's Salads, for a living
put on make-up like dolls, plea for 1-900 calls
what respectable artist does a tour of shopping malls?
well that'd be Tiffany.

we can't sing about political ills
honesty can't pay the bills
superficial, fake, successful and insincere
or isn't that what they want to hear?

what would bill haley say, if he looked around today
everyone's a dead head, or at least since Touch of Grey
was on mtv
paula abdul has a good set of... face
but you have to have integrity to sellout in the first place,
so forget her
(willie tyler and lester abdul)

the critics said our record stank
we smelled all the way to the bank
we can forgo integrity, quality, and message clear
or isn't that what they want to hear?

let's break 'a tall cool one' over robert plant's head
you know he sounded so much better when his blimp was made of Led
& not cheese
if we lost all our hair, would it help our record sales
'another day in paradise' for men whose hairlines fail:
phil collins
(take me to the bridge)

what subject would get you to pay?
well, we got this really short survey
we can get a big sponsor for the 25th reunion tour
or isn't that what they want to hear?

i'll be kissing the ground, when they take julie brown
and run her down with a fast Greyhound
well, i'll be acting really silly, if they killed milli vanilli
they'll have parades in philly, export their corpses to chile
i'll be ready to rock, when the new kids on the block
are outlined in chalk on a bloody side walk

well we can keep up with the latest trends
twelve year olds are my best friends
well i bought this guitar, i even know a chord or two
i'm trying to sing like i've heard other singers do
they'll me on the radio, yeah, they'll play the video too
it takes these three minutes to make our whole career
or isn't that what they want to hear?

you can sing about whatever you want
cause no one listens to the lyrics anymore