Handcuffs and bedposts, stockings and bull whips,
Cream and green jelly infatuations and silk slips.
Brown paper packages, fish nets and sailors,
Big leather masks, good leather tailors.

When the skin breaks, when the soul takes
Then I'm feeling grand.
I like the way that metal studs ping;
These are a few of my favourite things.

Poodles and leather, rubber and latex.
We like it that way, we don't like straight sex.
Pig masks and posers, photos and bruises
in the bath we're pretending we're ocean line cruises.

When the whip cracks, when the silk breaks
Then I'm feeling fine.
I like the way that agony sings;
These are a few of my favourite things.

Kitchen utensils, chairs and the like.
I feel like riding, don't get out the bike.
Bottles of oil, hot wax and butter
The thought of all this sends my heart a flutter.

When the bonds strain, when the welts show
Then I'm feeling fine.
The stinging blow, the way my head rings
These are a few of my favourite things.

Furry type mammals, hidden down pants
Whack on some leather, let's do a dance.
Pencils and broom sticks, covered with glee;
Whip me oh whip me oh PLEASE JUST WHIP ME!

When the room breaks, when the lights dim,
then I'm feeling fine.
Leather and rubber amongst other things
these are a few of my favourite things.

Its time you and me, came out of the closet,
but I do like the photo of me in a corset.
Really its cool, we're not really wankers.
In fact I'm a lawyer and she is a banker.

When the belts fly, when the zips catch
Then I'm feeling fine.
The cold metal feel of a silver cock-ring:
These are a few of our favourite things