The beer's all been bought with my brother's I.D;
My folks are away, and they've left only me:
The whole suburb knows - no need to call up -
My place tonight for a teenage piss up.

Most of the girls will chuck before eight;
Two Bundy and cokes is all it will take -
There's sex in the backyard, someone will claim -
Though who's screwing who no one can name.

Some bloke will get angry his girlfriend's been nicked
And take a swing at the guy who looked at his chick;
The girl will start screaming, "You two, break it up."
It's on at my place - a teenager piss up.

The party will break up when I call the cops
Or my parents come home and everyone stops;
There'll be c.d.'s destroyed - mainly my dad's;
There'll be binge drinking, just like on the ads.

Years later we'll look back and think of the time
When we thought having fun meant all getting blind;
And when we're away our teenage children play up -
My place tonight for a teenager piss up.

Drink beer quickly to be a real hero;
It don't taste nice - that's why they make Sub Zero's.
C'mon everybody, shout it out loud:
Ain't it great to be young, pissed and proud.

A long hard thirst might need a big cold beer,
But I'm just a teenage jerk followin' my peers.
I don't have to go to a psychologist -
My reason for drinkin' is I wanna get pissed.